Tuesday 25 October 2011

Bradford Monopoly [Review]

I have always been a massive fan of Monopoly since I was a little kid. It’s one of my very few claims to fame that, in 1997, I was the second best young Monopoly player in the UK, not a bad achievement really even if it does involve a particular year, the word ‘young’ and, of course, second. But, I did get to play the game in the Bank of England with real money even if I did miss the chance to go to New York as first prize.

But, I digress. Since then I have been a collector of Monopoly boards, snapping up ‘Here and Now’, ‘Classic’ in a wooden box replicating the original 1930s version, ‘Yorkshire’ and ‘Revolution’ versions, not including the old traditional one I have, plus the one for my home town, ‘York’. At one point I did contemplate buying every UK version ever made until a quick visit to Wikipedia made me realise just how many Waddingtons / Hasbro had released, and that I didn’t have rich parents or a swelling trust fund to help me fill my dreams.

As we near the end of 2011 the number of local themed Monopoly boards has become considerable – there is even a Leeds University one for heaven’s sake – and now we finally have one for Bradford. However, though I’m not scoffing at my adopted home town finally getting a board of its own, it doesn’t half smell of a cash-in.

At this point I’m going to disappoint some of the readers and say I’m not going to review the game of Monopoly. Chances (haha) are you’ll know if you like the game or not so changing a few place names won’t really make a difference to your enjoyment of the game. For those of you that haven’t, there is not enough time for me to spill out the rules of the game in this review, and certainly no reason to without boring the socks off the majority of readers.

You insist? Well, in a nutshell, up to six players journey around properties on a square board, buying them up and charging players who subsequently land on them rent, with the aim being to grab up sets of properties, build properties on them, and bankrupt the other players, all the time also having the opportunity to receive random gifts and benefits in the form of chance and community chest cards, whilst also trying not to be trapped at the dining table with your family for four plus hours waiting for someone to become skint or throw their money over the board in frustration. Satisfied?

Basically, the Bradford edition is like any of local adapted edition: the traditional Monopoly board with a makeover, with locations from London replaced with Bradford and West Yorkshire landmarks, buildings and areas, and a photographic montage stuck in the middle. Sadly, the houses and hotels don’t get replaced by mills and student accommodation, nor do the chance cards have ‘You receive a speeding fine for your quad bike’, ‘You come second in the Omar naan challenge. Receive £10’ or ‘You are assessed for building repairs but you are not Unipol registered so don’t have to worry’. Actually, scrub that, they have paid some attention to the cards. ‘You’re late for a show at the Alhambra Theatre’ (we’ve all been there); ‘You won a trolley dash around Morrisons’ (Clean up on aisle three); and ‘You have been caught littering on the streets of Little Germany’ (that was probably me, I live there), plus others, are included, so some imagination has gone into it. But still no mention of quad bikes.


And, before any typical Telegraph and Argus trolls comment, there isn’t a large hole in the centre of the board to reflect the failed Westfield development. Jeez.

What you do get is seven playing pieces, two dice, a speed die, a wad of money, houses and hotels, a cloth bag, chance, community chest and place cards, an instruction manual, of course the board, and a nice new smell as you open the box. And the ability to mortgage Ilkley Moor, something I’m sure Bradford Council have considered between ruining the old Odeon and cocking up the City Park by opening it in, er, January.

The board, of course, lives and dies on its properties, and it’s on this where there is much more of a sense of commercial input that on, say, my York board. Yes, there’s been a lot of sponsorship of squares by local radio stations and papers on previous boards, but it’s taken to all new levels on this one. As well as the usual suspects of the Alhambra; the National Media Museum and Odsal Station, we also get ‘Richard Dunn Sports Centre’, clearly valid to share a set with Odsal Stadium and Valley Square; Bronte Water Coolers instead of water works balanced against, er, the standard electric company (Yorkshire Electricity missed a trick there) and two squares dedicated to ‘Prestige Car Care’ and ‘Prestige IT Support’. I mean – who? What? Clearly they paid to be on there (presumably about half-way along the rate card as they are on the orange spaces) but, is it just me, or would you personally rather pay a few extra quid for the board and have some proper properties on there, like perhaps the University or Little Germany or Lister Mill? I don’t think ‘Advance to Prestige IT Support’ has the same ring to it – face it, you’d get there, they’d umm and err, put you on hold and tell you to turn it off and on again – as many others and just adds to the smell of corporate cash-in.

Elsewhere the properties are as expected – though I’m not sure how happy Haworth will be with being stuck in the poorest properties – even if additions like the ‘City Park’, which isn’t even finished yet are not totally unexpected but weird. Maybe they should have stuck in a current photo of it unfinished and then Hasbro could post out a sticker of the finished version when they finally get round to it.

Overall, the Bradford Monopoly board is a worthy purchase if you live in our fair city. Effort has gone in to customise some of the chance / community chest cards to expand on the properties featured, and there’s not many other opportunities you’d get to own ‘Bingley Music Live’, the ‘Wool Exchange’ and the ‘Telegraph and Argus’, though the latter at 220 Monopoly pounds if quite steep considering it was under a quid last time I picked up a copy.

Sure, the board smells of a Hasbro call centre calling up local businesses asking for sponsorship (“Come on, shove your logo on a community chest square”; “ A square for Kirkgate Market? Nah, what about a car care company we’ve not heard about?” (that said, all the free publicity they’re getting in this review must make it worth it for them); or “Shall we PhotoShop the miserable looking chap walking in front of the Alhambra Theatre? No. OK.”) and I would rather pay more for the board than random sponsorship, but it does what it says on the Bradford-photography-laden box (Ooh! That Mosque near Laisteridge Lane! Ooh! A Dalek! Ooh! East Riddlesden Hall!) and for £25 it’s nice to have something more relevant and local.

Positives: Nice customisation of cards, well built, if you like Monopoly you’ll like this.
Negatives: Poor choice of some places due to sponsorship, if you hate Monopoly you’ll hate this.

7/10

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